Whooaaa Nelly!

I have had a period of time in my life that I hope ends here very soon. You know, I went to church a few months ago and listened to a very good sermon about that saying...you know the one that people say to you and it always, always takes your breath away momentarily because there is something about it that shakes you deep inside. It is what people say to you when you have so many challenges going on in your life all at the same time..."God will never give you more than you can handle". I really truly wish that I could obliterate that statement from the human language.

Going back to the sermon about how God will never give you more than you can handle, well, it was suggested that this is something we say all the time to each other but it really has nothing to do with God. That is a statement that we, humans, came up with. When someone says that to me, I immediately think about how I wished he would stop trying to see just how much I could take. I think I will throw up all over the next person who says that to me.

I have more than I can handle right now (God...are you listening?). My dad had his colostomy reversal surgery and the surgeon forgot he doesn't have any kidneys and overdosed him on narcotic pain killers, he went into cardiac arrest for 4 1/2 minutes and we were lucky he took another breath. He can't seem to get out of the hospital with more and more complications everyday. My boyfriend has been struggling with symptoms that are suggesting he has a muscle disease, possibly muscular dystrophy or ALS. We had quite a scare with him where his liver and kidneys were in distress because of all the muscle breakdown in the body. We are trying to get him into the MDA/ALS Clinic at OHSU and trying to get financial assistance for that because we don't have insurance for him. My daughter seemed to be doing fine with no ongoing symptoms of dystonia/tardive dyskenesia after the scare we had in April/May but she had a dystonic reaction on Saturday, Monday and a really serious one last night that was affecting the breathing and lasted for three hours. Poor thing, her eyes were locked way back and off to the left. There were times where everything went black or her vision was blurry. It is really hard on the eye muscles when they are contracting like that for that long a period of time.

Then, I am currently trying to make progress in packing up my house preparing for our big move, then there is my job, and my business - Scrapdango, and everything else that happens in our lives in between. Oh! How could I forget...I also turned 39 years old amidst all this too! (Thanks again God!!!).

I think I have had all I can handle. God? Are you listening? I am going to take the guess work out of this and just tell you that...enough is enough! This is my limit! This is all I can handle at one time.